Finding Yourself Again

Mommy, wife, daughter, sister, friend…we all wear so many hats everyday and they all require us to give ourselves to someone else. From keeping our littles alive to giving our besties advice, at the end of the day we are left with nothing more to give, especially to ourselves.

Like so many of you, I strive to be the absolute best mother, wife, daughter, sister, and friend – so much so that I typically sacrifice taking care of me. It is too easy to put ourselves last since so many other people in our lives are counting on us and need us. Folding laundry, making lunches, unloading the dishwasher, helping with homework, nighttime feedings, cleaning the house, I could go on and on. All this (and more) takes precedence and we get lost in the crazy.

For some reason “mommy guilt” sets in the moment we do something for ourselves. Why are we wired this way and how do we change this mindset? When you get on a plane, the flight attendant tells us, “Please place the mask over your own mouth and nose before assisting others”. Maybe we should take a page from the FAA and apply this concept to real life.

As a full-time working mom to three little ones I have constantly struggled with this concept, and as most recently as six months ago, I thought I had it all figured out. I had finally found a way to balance (well almost balance) all the roles and still make time for me. 5am was my time and I used it to work out. It was the most rewarding way to start my day and gave me the superpowers I needed to be all things to all people. Then, six months ago, we welcomed our new little love and I realized quickly that I was back to square one.  5am workouts were no longer in the cards for me as overnight feedings were now my priority.  I remember thinking, “Will I ever workout again?” “Will I ever have five minutes alone again?” At the time it felt impossible but as they say, this too shall pass. And it did. As I write this I am happy to report we have found our stride.  I am in a groove, finding the time to do something for myself each day.  Sometimes it’s a DIY facial or listening to a personal development podcast on my way to work. It doesn’t matter how small the act, it will make its mark on your soul and help you be the best mom, wife, daughter, sister, and friend you can be.

Ok mamas, let’s make a pact. We will not give into “mommy guilt” anymore and instead give into ourselves. We are strong, fierce women that make so much happen every day. We are the Great Oz behind the curtain, the puppet master, the conductor, the director, you get the idea. We are amazing!

So the next time you feel that your cup is empty from taking care of the world…stop, take a breath, and take time for you. You have permission. With so many people counting on you Mama, you owe it to yourself and to everyone else to stop and put your oxygen mask on first.