It’s 6:55pm. The dishes are piled up waiting to be washed; noise fills the house. Everyone knows what is coming up next. A final wrestling match, followed by the beginning of our bedtime routine.
Listen: I confess I am organizationally challenged, terrible (so terrible!) with crafts, not the best cook, and my laundry is piled so high I have lost all hope of ever seeing the bottom. There are only a few things I am pretty good at in the day-to day, and one of them is bedtime. Putting the kids to bed is my jam. All 4 of my children, including three boys – ages 9, 7 and 5 who share a room, are usually asleep by 7:30.
When your child was a baby, you likely heard the importance of having a bedtime routine to help them distinguish day from night. But as my kids grew, they kind of grew out of that baby routine. Years went by before I really noticed the need to reinvent our bedtime routine. So, if you find yourself in that weird in-between stage with your kids where you think something needs to change, here are a few ideas you could try:
Listen to audio books
Librivox and Overdrive are my favorite places to listen to books for free. And of course Audible is a subscription I hold more highly than anything else. Some books we have enjoyed for bedtime listening are The Railway Children, How to Train Your Dragon, Robin Hood and The Wizard of Oz.
Stretch!
This part of our routine was born out of my oldest suffering from growing pains. Stretching helped ease his mind and his body before getting in to bed for the night, and now all four of my kids love stretching before bed. There are yoga books for kids if you really want to get into this, but we just stick with simple stretches.
Make up a silly bedtime song together
This gets those last minute giggles out before going to bed and guarantees a smile. Is there anything sweeter than peeking in on your kids at night and seeing a sweet smile on their sleeping faces?
Sharing roses and thorns
It is so important as a parent to give your child space to talk with you. Ask each child the worst part of their day (thorns) and the best part of their day (rose). Occasionally I will also ask them if they have any questions about anything they have come across that day. Giving each child space to share whatever is on their heart is so important. Some of our best conversations happen at the close of our days now, and we are all growing closer because if it.
No matter what, keeping your bedtime routine is consistency and positivity are key. Don’t rush it. No matter how badly you want to just throw your kids in their room and shut the door, it’s important to take your time and make it enjoyable for everyone. Sally Clarkson really made me think more intentionally about creating life giving routines with my children, including bedtime. If you aren’t familiar with Sally Clarkson, just imagine the sweetest older woman you know, and give her the other-worldly ability to speak life and encouragement with every fiber of her being. Sally said this about speaking love to your children at the close of each day:
“No matter what has transpired throughout the day, we can close it by speaking to our children’s hearts with something like ‘I love you no matter what. Please forgive me for my impatience today’ or ‘I forgive you for your disobedience today’ or ‘You are very precious to me. I am blessed to have you. You may go to sleep without bearing anger or a guilty conscience or fear because I love you and God loves you, and He will be with you.’ “
So, don’t be afraid to reinvent your bedtime routine. It can be as short or as long as you’d all like it. But changing how you think about it could change so much in your home. Injecting love, gentleness and encouragement in to your relationship with your children each night will have lasting effects.
I’d love to hear about your bedtime routines. What is your favorite part of your current routine? What would you like to change? Leave a comment and let us know!
